Living At Wit's End

So I had grand plans for yesterday, even though it was Valentine’s Day. The plan: get up early do school take the kids to see their grandmother at the rehab/nursing home for Valentine’s Day shop for Valentines picnic create de-cluttering plan pick one area of the house start de-cluttering and do a surface clean of that area take the three youngest kids to my parents to spend the night pack picnic make the Director a valentine card take older two to church for their Peer Ministry Valentine party go to movie in the park with the Director Reality - I woke up not feeling good at all.  After being up about 20 minutes I told the kids today was a holiday.  (As we homeschool year round and usually have more than the required days each year I didn't feel bad or worried about taking the day off.)  I went back to bed for a couple of hours.  When I got up for the second time, I ended up sitting with the kids searching for valentine card i...

Back to my dilemma, this year I guess it’s a case of bad timing.   Valentine’s Day came at the wrong time or maybe it’s the fight that came at the wrong time.   Either way I’m not feeling overly lovey or connected and I don’t feel like giving a mushy card!   So, what to do?   Well, after some long thought and reading some more stuff on the subject of “act-as-if” I’ve learned, and have come to realize that I don’t act “act-as-if” in most aspects of my life.   Like the speaker and author Mike Robbins says “ although I understand the concept of "acting as if" … about how we have the power to create our own reality, in certain areas of my life - especially the ones that are most important to me or the ones where I feel the most cynical and resigned, I often pay "lip service" to acting as if, while simply hoping things will get better, worrying that they won't, or allowing the outcome to determine how optimistic or pessimistic my outlook and approach will be. This...

What is it about Valentine’s Day that makes us feel as if we HAVE to do something special for someone we love?   And, what about all the singles out there that don’t have someone special to spend this day with or do something for?   I’ll bet they are pretty annoyed with Valentine’s Day.   Is it the day or is it the way the media hypes it up?   I mean really life is NOT like the romance novels, you know the ones I’m talking about, I call them lust in the dust books.   I picked up one once and only got through the first 10 pages, honestly I was embarrassed and repulsed not to mention disgusted because stuff in those books does not happen in real life! Oh!   And don’t get me started on movies!   The stuff in romance movies or romantic comedies is SO not real!   Real life is about real people living real lives!   Movies show only beautiful people living these fantastic, wonderful, lives full of merriment, and happiness in the end. (I believe...

The second thing that came to mind is, if I don’t get The Director something does he view this as me not loving him?!   What happens if this year I’m just not in the mood to give him a Valentine card? First of all, after attending a Love and Respect conference I found out that most men don’t like mushy, flowery, overflowing lovey, romantic cards, it’s not their language.   According to Emerson & Sarah Eggerichs , men want manly cards that speak their language of love (different from The Five Love Languages   that Gary Chapman writes about).   Cards that use words that appreciate a man’s work, achievements, the protection and provisions he makes for his family, appreciation for his strength, leadership, his desire to analyze and counsel, his insight and how much he is respected and admired.   While men want to know they are loved and don't mind hearing I love you, they are shown your love by using words of affirmation that speak to their God given wiri...

First I am rating this post PG, mainly because I want to talk about adult relationships. Secondly, I set off on one thought process this morning, and now my head is swimming with thoughts and ideas having to do with Valentine’s Day, love, romance, and relationships.   So, who knows where this is going to go. As I wrote this, it became apparent that it was way too long for one post, so it will be posted over several days, in several parts.   Not all parts are rated PG.   Actually this is awesome!   I have posts for the next four or five days!! Valentine’s Day   is a holiday surrounded by legend, myth and mystery.   It is rooted in the ancient Roman festival of Lupercalia, but we know from archeology digs that there are at least three martyrs named Valentine that the church recognizes as saints.    And at least one has the feast day of February 14 th .   Legend says that Valentines, sent to a loved one, dates back as far as 1415....